Is This Country Safe For Humans?

–Kakali Das |

We wake up in the morning and read horrific news as headlines everyday as if it’s customary and normal. The news story that pushed me over the edge came out in Bihar a couple of days ago – a 15-year-old deaf-mute child was gang raped in Bihar. Her assaulters damaged her eyes with a sharp object after they were done with her, because they didn’t want to be identified by her. Let’s consider the fact that here is a child of 15 who cannot hear and speak, and now she cannot see. And the fact that this incident happened and we just went back to our daily lives, because this is the country we live in, is extremely disturbing. There was news like, a child was gang raped in Bihar; another one was of a 50-year-old who was gang raped by a Priest and two of his friends in Uttar Pradesh. A member of the National Commission for Women (NCW), a statutory body of the Government of India that is meant to look at the rights of women, who visited the family of that 50-year-old, who was gang raped and murdered, stepped out after that visit and made a statement saying that if she had not gone out at night or if somebody in her family had accompanied her, the crime wouldn’t have happened, affectively blaming the victim again – in what can only be described as, perhaps, the sickening statement that we read recently in the year that we have had. The Madhya Pradesh Chief Minister, Shivraj Singh Chouhan, while suggesting that the legal age for marriage of women be raised from 18-21 years also very helpfully suggested that his state would bring in a system where a woman who step out of home for work must register themselves at the local Police Station and let them be tracked in order to keep themselves safe. Promptly, one of the legislatures of the opposition in his state, Congress, Sajjan Singh Verma made a statement saying, “A 15-year-old girl can reproduce, so why increase marriage age?”. The fact that these incidents are taking place with nobody is reacting to it, and women continue to go about their day looking over their shoulder, absorbing this kind of rubbish news on a daily basis makes me really distressed. There is no larger plan to do anything about it and things, as it seems, would go on as it is perennially.

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Rape is not an issue about women; rape is a societal issue, because when incidents as horrific as this happens to a child, a girl, a woman or a boy/man to be precise, it grapples the entire family around their throats. The family has to bear the brunt of the heinous act committed on their child. The questions that arise here, are we going to lock our daughters in their rooms? Are we going to allow governments to track their location?

“A had a very interesting conversation with a friend of mine who asked me if I regretted having a daughter the second time around. I asked her that why an educated, modern, independent woman like her would ask me a question of this kind in the 21^st century. To which she replied that the reason behind it was that I had two daughters and every woman in India ended up being molested and raped. She asked as though why I would want to give birth to more women in such horrendous times, and I was outraged, of course, but I gave it a deeper thoughtThe fact still remains that we blame women for rape that takes place every thirty minutes in our country, and we prefer staying deaf and mute about it for the rest of our lives”,Meghna Pant, Author and Journalist said.

This isn’t an issue about men vs women but about gender inequality. Gender inequality is a disease in this country, and rape, trafficking, dowry system, domestic violence, all of these are symptoms of this disease. We need to begin by talking about the fact that gender sensitivity needs to be included and started as a curriculum in schools itself. We need to start addressing not just female behaviour, but male behaviour too. This entire cultural messaging that makes women a repository of shame in matters of sexual violence especially needs to be unplugged, and a formative action needs to be taken at the foremost by fathers and mothers while raising their kids irrespective of genders. The mothers must teach their sons and daughters to respect each other equally, and this value must be ingrained in them since their very childhood.

“I was much younger and my mother had to go to Delhi to get an operation as she was diagnosed with an artery blockage back in the day. I remember my aunt who was my custodian at that point had told me that I needed to come back home before sunset and that I was her responsibility in the absence of my mother. She kept on reiterating how it felt like absorbing flames of fire while raising a girl child with responsibilities of the world in hand. I was left to wonder as to why it was so different raising a girl child than a male child, and for how long would my mother or my custodian feel the pressure of this intensity in their lives”, KubbraSait, An Actor said.

What I believe is that every boy and girl should be made to feel safe at the very least. We must have the sense of respect and safety that comes from both men and women for each other. The emotional quotient needs to exist and prevail within the humans, along withthe freedom of communication or expression, and the people, irrespective of gender, should know their boundaries as to when and where one shouldn’t cross and limit oneself to. The people in power should educate themselves regarding how to address situation of such kinds; they need to have empathy and must put themselves in the place of the victim and the family before voicing their pathetic and gory statements out in the public.

Food, Fees and Freedom – The three magic silver bullets which can actually be influenced for a better world for girls and women to live in. One of the massive problems we have in our country is that young girls don’t get fed as adequately as their brothers. This leads to them being anaemic, underweight, they then become early moms who give birth to underweight children and thus struggle with disease and empowerment throughout their lives. 50% of the girl child in our country are anaemic, and more girls are underweight and malnourished than the boys, which is obvious. Thus, we can find girls around us whose food we can sponsor. Secondly, nothing can compensate for the empowerment that comes with education. We need to find a girl child(which isn’t difficult) whose fees we can sponsor. Thirdly, freedom comes from knowing our rights; hence, it’s suggested that people read up on the rights that women have. For an instance, no cop can speak to a girl or call her to the police station without the presence of a female constable, and no girl can be called to the station after dark. There are rights that are written into our laws for us. Educate yourself about the rights, as it’s easy to quickly search on the internet and find out about it, and then educate the women around you. The women who are unaware of the fact that their husbands aren’t allowed to beat them up, who doesn’t know that dowries are illegal, and that they can file an FIR against it, or who doesn’t know that they are entitled to compensation from the government on various things, must be made aware of the laws that are written for the safety of them. Educate the women about their rights, and that will give them the empowerment that the society is attempting to take away from them. We can educate the girls and women around us that the law gives them the right to be strong and vocal about their perspectives and beliefs in life.