RESILIENCE

RESILIENCE (NOUN)

Dr. Rita Gurung Kamalapuri

In today’s fast changing, materialistic world, we have become disconnected from our spiritual base leading to depression, mental distress and even suicides, especially among the younger generation.

Life, in itself, is not easy. But why are there people who succeed at life whereas others fail. The answer may lie in a human trait known as resilience.

The APA defines resilience as “the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, or even significant sources of stress.” ¹

It is the ability to recover from adversity. However, it is not inborn trait, it is developed, and can be taught and trained. It is a dynamic process which helps one to adapt successfully to the adversities of life.²

Resilience is derived from the ways that individuals learn to think and act when faced with obstacles. For psychologist Mary Alvord, ³ “resilience is a skill that takes practice. It works like a muscle. We can build it through effort and repetition, and we want to keep our muscles strong and flexible so that we can think of many ways to solve a problem.”

“Schools can develop resilience in children by identifying Risk and Protective factors and helping the child develop positive body image. They should also explain the importance of proper nutrition. Schools can inculcate Resilience program into the school Guidance Program and integrate compassionate curriculum. Teaching problem solving skills can make children feel worthy and also provides a base of physical and psychological safety.”

People famous for their resilience are Loius Vuitton, Elvis Presley, Tony Robbins, Nelson Mandela, Walt Disney, Charlie Chaplin, Stephen Hawking, to name a few.

Resilience is the belief that while you cannot control everything in your life, there are that you can control, including your attitude. Different types of resilience influence a person’s ability to cope with different kinds of stress.⁴

1. Physical resilience: which enables a person to deal with physical demands and illnesses.
   1. Mental resilience:  enables one to adapt to uncertainty and helps in problem solving
   1. Emotional resilience: enables one to regulate emotions.
   1. Social /community resilience: enables groups to recover from different difficult situations.

How we deal with adversity is significant. In Resilience theory: A summary of the research, Moore ⁵ writes: “resilience helps us to survive, recover, and even thrive in the face and wake of misfortune.” Examples can be cited of survivors of the Holocaust, war, neglect, poverty and abuse. Certain character strengths which are significant predictors like hope, bravery and justice helps people adapt positively in the face of challenges.

1. Resilient people can accept harsh realities facing them.
2. They can define meaning in terrible times.
3. They can improvise, have pro-social competencies and are helpful and compassionate
4. They have a psychological sense of safety, positive values and a purpose in life

The study of resilience gained prominence when Seligman sought to understand the basic question of how a person could be happy in spite of adversities. His 3Ps⁶  are  aspects that affect resilience in an individual and which are to be guarded against. These emotional reactions arise out of a faulty thought process and therefore need a perspective change.

These are:

1. Personalization: a cognitive distortion where individuals blame themselves for bad things.  They think “it is my fault”, and feel guilty for events not in their control.
2. Pervasiveness: assuming that negative situations will happen always because of one bad situation, creating the feeling that “all is lost”.
3. Permanence: believing that bad experiences and events last forever. It is the feeling that “nothing will be good ever again”.

Resilience exists in a spectrum and basically, it has three modes where individuals are:

1. Devastated: absolutely devastated by adversity, and not able to recover. They usually indulge in self-harm, run away from home, and / or resort to suicides.
2. Medium: People who can bear adversity and recover to the prior position.
3. PTG (Post Traumatic Growth): They can bear adversity and come back stronger after the situation.

A study by The International Resilience Project⁷ states the 3 sources of resilience within an individual:

1. external supports and resources that promote resilience, trusting relationships, structures and rules at home, access to health, education, welfare and safety.
2. internal, personal strength, feelings, attitudes and beliefs within the child such as self-esteem, altruism, self-love, autonomy, faith, hope and trust.
3. social and interpersonal skills which is learned through interaction, including the ability to communicate, problem solve, manage feelings and impulses.

UNDERSTANDING RISK FACTORS AND PROTECTIVE FACTORS:

Risk Factors and Protective factors affect resilience in children and has to be kept in balance. If Risk Factors are more than the Protective Factors, the child will be a vulnerable child and he/ she will lack resilience.

Risk Factors includes Community violence, dysfunctional families, family conflict, having a single parent, sexual, physical and/or emotional abuse and bullying, insecure attachment and poor social skills, peer rejection, lack of supervision at home, and poor health and well being

Protective factors include positive physical development, good academic achievement, problem solving skills and a sense of responsible autonomy. Apart from these, connectedness with family, school, peers and friends, physical and psychological and the presence of a caring adult- parent and/ or teacher are also important.

How to develop resilience in children:

Parental education and teacher training are important sources of Protective Factors that can help develop resilience in children and make them better and stronger individuals. These include:

1. Allowing the children to face reality and failure and making them understand that it is not the end of the world
2. Giving children the right environment where children can see resilient adults.
3. Not overprotecting /pampering the child and allowing them to share responsibility
4. Teaching children frustration tolerance and keeping them away from instant gratification.

Signs and symptoms/vulnerable child: Check for behavioural issues both at home and at school, addiction and substance abuse, poor academic performance, relationship issues, high risk behavior, and withdrawal.

Schools can develop resilience in children by identifying Risk and Protective factors and helping the child develop positive body image. They should also explain the importance of proper nutrition. Schools can inculcate Resilience program into the school Guidance Program and integrate compassionate curriculum. Teaching problem solving skills can make children feel worthy and also provides a base of physical and psychological safety.

People lacking resilience have victim mentality, become overwhelmed easily and use unhealthy coping mechanisms like addictions to deal with problems. They are slow to recover from setbacks and experience more psychological distress, depression as well as suicidal ideation.

Resilience in itself does not eliminate stress, but enables people to understand that setbacks happen, and that life is difficult. It enables people to recover faster and come back stronger. It gives people the strength to solve problems, overcome adversity and move on with their lives.

References:

1. American Psychological Association, (2014) cited in Resilience definitions, theory and challenges., Southwick, SM, Bonanno, GA and Yehuda, R, ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
   1. Southwick SM., Bonanno GA., Masten AS. Resilience definitions, Theory and challenges: Inter disciplinary perspectives. European Journal of Psychotraumatology. Published online October 2014, cited in Resilience Theory in Psychology (Definition and Characteristics) by Pamela Li, June 28, 2022, parentingforbrain.com
   1. 5 ways to build resilience in students, Social and emotional learning by Sarah Gosner, March 26, 2021, George Lucas Educational foundation
   1. Kendra Cherry, “What is Resilience”, March 13, 2023, verywellmind.com
   1. Catherine Moore,      Resilience theory: A summary of the research, 30 Dec, 2019., positivepsychology.com
   1. Moore, ibid
   1. Edith Grotberg, August 1995, A guide to Promoting resilience in children: Strengthening the human spirit:  The International Resilience Project, Early Childhood Development: Practice and Reflections Number 8. Bernard Van Leer Foundation.

Dr. Rita Gurung Kamalapuri is currently the Principal of Assam Public School, Duliajan. She is a certified counselor, an NLP life coach, a numerologist and a tarot reader. She is also working for her Masters degree in Psychology.

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